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| snippets from 2014 :) |
So here I am with multiple chrome windows consisting of cases and stuff that I'm researching on, words documents, pdfs, itunes-to keep me awake and concentrate-open, in bed, with my laptop that probably has not been shut down for almost a month now. Realizing that I'm on the edge of 2014, I realize that this year has been such an adventure.
I can't help but to feel like all of them are just blurring memories due to the fact that the year literally runs with the speed of light. So much things happen. I remember from day 1 of the year, I had to prepare my high school batch's event from our juniors, to the very last day, which is now, where I've got some research to do.
But right now, I can't help but to feel grateful to be able to experience things that came into my way. People that I met, people that I got to know, people that I got to work with. Things that I feel, elation, hearing the news that I got accepted into this whole big body of organization and this small but closely knitted family of moot competition that I join, pissed, nervous, anxious, and feeling not sure of myself and questioning of whether I am actually deserve this all or I just simply stranded here, lost, feeling like trash, stupid, dumb, betrayed, frustrated, demotivated........I basically feel like I am finally living and actually experiencing things. And for that, I am grateful.
Which makes me remember that I got a lot of firsts this year! But nope, still no boyfriend unfortunately lol but I don't think that I am that desperate to get myself one though. I still have my friends and family anyway, in which I can always drag anytime I want to go somewhere. (some of my firsts are actually called cute by a guy, having an online friend, a guy that i took picture with in an event turns out not wanting to let go of my arm-although it was just a joke but still!--watching movies with another guy..... well see! progress!)
Contemplating these things makes me happy somehow-it actually feels like I'm not really wasting my time. I am actually learning (yes learning, not studying), facing out my fears of getting into big waterslides and ended up craving for it until now, trying new things, finding out that pleading, as hard as it is, is actually quite fun, and go out meeting and making new friends along the way. I also realize that things do not go as I wanted to do but oh well- it's just the way it is and sometimes you just have to roll with it. My resolution? Well I think I got my lifetime resolution got checked this year so I think that's real good for me lol I don't really made resolution anyway beside being happy and giving my best shot in anything and working out more-which I did!
Anyway. Really. I am really grateful for being able to experience and feel those things in 2014. I know that 2015 will be a challenging year, but I'm really looking forward to it.
